Dens

A couple weeks ago we took advantage of Dr. Foster & Smith's anniversary sale and bought the basenjis each a "den." It says right on them "pet dens." They were immediately assembled and left out so the boys could get used to them. Cleo didn't get one - she has her bed and is happy there and does not roam.
The plan was to start (what we assumed would be a painful process) having the dogs sleep in these dens when my maternity leave started. That way Zu was not crated most of the day AND night which seems quite unfair and unhealthy for him. Of course it's his own fault he is crated - if he would just chill rather than be destructive he could lounge around free all day like the other dogs. Though after Saturday morning maybe freedom with each other isn't a great idea for the dogs anyway.
Speaking of Saturday - we decided two angry dogs with wounds might as well start sleeping in their personal dens right away. Each den has a pillow, and we placed our space heater between the two to ensure the pups would be warm enough. J went in after the bait (cheese) without issue, laid down and cleaned himself then slept. Zu on the other hand went right in after the bait, ate it and then seemed to have a "wtf" moment when he realized the door was closed behind him. Even with his e-collar on he managed to get to the pillow and rip into it. He only hurts himself. He had to spend the rest of the night with only the plastic bottom to sleep on. He had bouts of wakefulness that contained scratching, digging, yelping and general anger at wanting out but for the most part he was okay (or maybe I just didn't notice - I was taking full advantage of some earplugs I had).
Last night was worse. Zu only slept for about 5-6 hours and that was split into a ~2.5 block and ~3.5 block of time. His behavior escalated also as he added chewing, thrashing, and whimpering/crying to the mix. I woke up this morning knowing it will get better - though unfathomably it could get worse first I suppose. I also thought cool, I've survived a sleepless night and I feel ok. I know that's going to become the norm here pretty soon and I've been a bit worried about it and how I'd cope. I'm still nervous considering that was only 1 night.
In any case, there's no going back. We cannot reason with the dogs and come up with some part-time system like only having them in dens on weekends or stopping now and going back to it in a few weeks when I'm on leave. It's begun and we must continue - we must win the battle and get them (him) over this hump.
We'll see what tonight holds. I'm working to attract a good nights sleep with calm, happy, positive thoughts of nested basenjis, warm and snuggly in their dens. I know it's happening. We are receiving that, but it just may take a few days.

Cluster

Today has calmed down significantly. This morning was a complete clusterfuck.
The dogs would not let me sleep in - I was only hoping to stay in bed until 7am but at 6:58 all the dogs were up and one was puking under my bed. I should have known the day would be "interesting" but I'm trying to be positive and follow the law of attraction.
I thought I took the rude awakening rather well and just continued with my morning getting breakfast ready for everyone, doing my shot, and getting a shower. It all started to plummet when I went to let the dogs out and J was growling and protecting the food he didn't eat. I managed to get him out of the room & the food picked up while Zu waited patiently in his crate. I let him out and we headed to the door to get everyone outside. J came in and went after Zu immediately. A tussle like that isn't abnormal; someone gets rolled over and there's a raucous. But this morning Zu rolled J back over and attacked back. I could tell instantly things had escalated and we had a real fight happening. I tried to use the bath towel still wrapped around my wet hair to break them up, then Gato (our big male tabby) came running in and literally jumped on the pile of dogs. That worked for only a second and I tried to keep them apart but failed.
At this point I'm freaking out. They are gnawing on each other and I can see both are covered in blood. I'm worried I won't be able to break them up and they're just going to kill each other like wild dogs. I was yelling by this point as if that would help. As if hearing they might kill each other or that I could go into labor with all this drama would make them stop.
Next I tried to use the dog bed to break them up, then the rolling desk chair (stupid idea it was the least helpful item). Then I hear a familiar shrieking - Gato is back, screaming like a banshee and jumping on the dogs - AGAIN. All that did was get him tossed aside and tufts of his fur went flying. I moved on to the baby gate at this point - thrusting it into the swirling mass of basenji trying to separate them. I think what ended up working was that they were tired. I got them into the hallway and they were no longer rolling around. I grabbed J (who had Zu's neck in his mouth) and just shooshed them and tried to calm them down. I pulled J off Zu and thought - SUCCESS!
Nope. Zu came after him again and I tried to prevent him from making contact by lifting J off the ground by his scruff. So here I am swinging my 30lb dog by the scruff of his neck, about 3ft off the ground while the other dog leaps up and grabs onto some part of him. So as if I had not already surpassed the weight I'm supposed to lift I'm now swinging 2 dogs in the air. Zu quickly loses his grip and fortunately it's just as J is being swung in front of the bathroom. I threw him inside and slammed the door.
I'd had it. I'd physically and emotionally had it. I walked into my room leaving J in the bathroom and Zu in the hall to lick their wounds and I collapsed on my bed. By now I'm hyperventilating. That was more of a workout than I'd had since June or July. I was shaking and a bit worried about myself at that point. I needed to calm down and get my breathing under control so I called D. Of course he was out-of-town today! I know this would have never happened if he were home. He would have just grabbed a dog at the beginning. I stupidly thought the fight would not escalate and of course I didn't want to risk getting bit in the mix. I woke D up; he probably thought I was in labor, but I tried to get enough words out so he knew I was okay. As my breathing got under control, I could feel my lungs burning and I started coughing. I'm still coughing hours later. I hope it's just due to irritation and my defenses didn't get low enough to let one of the bugs going around settle into my chest.
So now it's early evening and finally, after the morning melee, 2 visits to the vet (1 for each bastard-ass basenji), and $400 in vet bills I'm relaxing. I'm not relaxed yet, but relaxing. Tonight D will be home and the dogs will spend their first evening in their new dens. We bought them for when the baby comes and have had them setup for awhile so the dogs could get used to them. We hadn't planned to have them start sleeping in there until I went on leave but things change. They may not even spend the night in the bedroom at this point. It's not that I'm angry. They're dogs, and not the most domesticated breed so I know these things can happen. I mainly just need my rest. I need to focus on me tonight after focusing on them all day.
So much for tackling anything on my "to do" list today. I'd like to say I'll make up for that tomorrow but I won't and shouldn't. I'll just pick a couple items and then plan to relax all afternoon and evening. I'm starting to take some half-days next week at work. I hit a wall around 2:30pm everyday and by then it seems pointless to deal with the hassle of the comfort room so I just work through the exhaustion. I imagine this is just going to get worse so I asked if I could split my personal days into halves and take a couple each week. I hope that does the trick.
Speaking of naps - I think I should take one before I make myself or the pets dinner.

baby shower

This past weekend was our “big” baby shower in PA. It’s the “big” one in part because it has the largest guest list but also because it was the one where we raffled off the envelope from our doctor – the one that has the baby’s sex written in it. I blogged about this briefly a few months ago when I first hatched the idea. Basically, guests were able to buy raffle tickets and then there was a drawing. The “winner” got a tote bag, but more importantly the envelope. This lucky lady got to decide if we would open the envelope and learn the baby’s sex or keep it sealed and find out when he/she is born.
All the proceeds collected are going to charity (CARE.org). We chose CARE because before baby T was on the horizon we (well, mainly me) were looking into volunteer vacations abroad. It started out as part of a Costa Rica trip we were planning to coincide with D’s work sending him there. When that trip was cancelled I figured why not look into other locations as well. I was really interested in going to Africa. I began reading up on CARE’s opportunities in Tanzania and I was excited to look into it further and potentially make actual plans to volunteer there with them. I’d still like to do that, but we’ll have to wait until the baby is old enough to spend a month with grandma or old enough to spend a month with us in Africa. Either way, it won’t be on our radar again for a few years. Since we are waiting to volunteer, I thought it was fitting to have our raffle money go to the organization. We even have a donor matching all the funds we raised! We were really excited that so many people bought tickets and that we raised as much money as we did. It’s a nice chunk of money.
As of the drawing, I still didn’t actually want to know what was in the envelope. I made D draw the winning ticket because I knew he wouldn’t care as much as me which option the winner chose. If I had chosen someone who opened it I would have been upset with myself. I was hoping the winner would decide to keep the envelope sealed. I was surprised to find the room was split about 50/50 with people who wanted it opened vs. closed. I thought for sure everyone would want it opened.
As D drew the name and held it up for us to read, I knew immediately the envelope was safe. He drew my mom’s name. I think she wanted it to remain sealed regardless of what I wanted, but maybe what I wanted played a part too. I’m not sure. In any case, it’ll be secret for another 6 weeks or so. D is coping well – he’s waited this long.
We got a lot of nice things at the shower. We are almost ready for baby but we do have some things to do (and buy). They’re not crucial but of course in my mind I’ve categorized them as such anyway.
My car needs detailed and the car seat installed. That’s a biggie. I also need to wash all the baby’s clothes & bedding. I guess we’ll need diapers and of course I have to choose a pediatrician. I sent a mass email out at work and to friends and D did the same asking for nominees. Luckily we got quite a few repeat recommendations so we have the list narrowed down at least. Monday I called and joined a bunch of “meet and greet” sessions at a few offices. Most offices are about 20 minutes away. I hope that’s not going to be an issue. Maybe we’ll end up choosing one that’s closer though, who knows.
The largest roadblock in getting everything done is me. I’m so tired all the time. I need to find a way to take naps during the day or get ready faster in the morning so I can sleep in. I’m not sure, but I need more sleep and something tells me a separate batch will work better than tacking it on to what I already get. I have about a month left at work, and I’m not sure how I’m going to get through the day at the end of that. Others all managed just fine so either I’m a complete wuss or I’m worried about nothing and it’ll be fine.
That’s really my only complaint as far as how I feel. My back is starting to ache but I know I could do things to make that better. I could see Dr. Brett, or get a massage, or sit on the inflatable exercise ball, or all of the above. Instead, I just don’t do anything (see previous complaint on being tired). I do realize being tired is only going to get worse once baby T arrives.

February 2008

I haven't posted in nearly 2 months! Maybe I can at least do once a month and this will be my February '08 entry. I wonder if anyone visits this anymore or if everyone has given up. I don’t think I ever had that many readers anyway – of course I don’t really know because they’d all have been lurkers except the usual suspects who are often kind enough to comment. Though I have not been very good at reciprocating lately.
Anyway, I’m not sure that I’ve missed the blog or just missed my voice. I’ve been keeping up with some blogs and looking for more actually. I’m not sure how to find a stranger’s blog that I like but that’s my goal. It’s not a big goal, as in I’m not actually trying to meet it. I have way too many other things on my plate. But it is something I think about occasionally so for lack of a better term I’ll call it a goal.
I’ve been back to MySpace and Facebook also. I still like the former best and am glad to see some of the changes that they’ve made to be like Facebook. I really don’t get all the applications and games on Facebook though I must say it’s better than surveys on MySpace. I vowed not to even join Facebook but I was lured in by a friend overseas – a friend who now rarely gets onto the site. Sigh. She’s bad at online and I’m bad at phone calls but neither of us want to lose touch. It’s tricky.
If you’ve read some of the old entries you may remember we did a substantial amount of home remodeling & repairs over the past year or more. We finished up this fall, but have continued to do this and that. We’re mainly organizing. I hate the work but love the outcome. I even bought a labeler and have been using it (judiciously though). The kitchen was by far the largest undertaking but I’m really happy with it. It needs work cosmetically but the cupboards and drawers and all the items inside are organized – and yes, labeled. Our list is dwindling, it’s a good thing.
At this point the gorilla in the room (or blog) is being talked around and is at least for me it’s noticeable. I’m not avoiding the gorilla; I just plan to address those updates in a separate blog. I just needed to get back and get myself out there a bit.